Montana Christmas

Christmas in Montana:

A reflective collection of soft, somber grays...

The Flathead River and Columbia Mountain


Clear, piercing blues...

the road to Essex

Frozen moons and brilliant whites.

hovering around zero - frostbite skiing

Then at last... a warm explosion of light and color!

Oh Christmas Tree!

What a beautiful time of celebration and love...

Merry Christmas to All

A Reminder

So I've been watching CNN at the gym lately. There have been several news stories regarding the effect of military deployments on the children left at home. Yeah, probably not the best stories to be watching on this end of J's deployment! One of the biggest points made was that is IS affecting, particularily for three categories of kids: teens, girls, and reservists/families away from military bases. We've got two out of three covered - at least we don't have a teenager! The incidence of anxiety and depression skyrockets in those three groups. Another major factor was the attitude, support and abilities of the parent at home running the daily ins and outs of life. Wow - that hit me like a ton of bricks! So much of my children's success and mental well being is related to how positive I can make this experience for them. Hmmm... that got me thinking... What are some ways to keep this light hearted, positive, even... dare I think... fun?

Here are some ideas:

1. I've decided that when I talk about the deployment, I couch things in positive terms. Such as, Daddy is leaving to mobilize, but we get to see him in less than two months after that - that's no time!

2. We get to go back to California where Kara was born for an extended vacation to visit him before he deploys overseas.

3. Summer will be here and we'll take trips, visit family and friends, and do a lot of fun summer things. Then the school year will be full of activities and exciting learning.

summer garden

4. We'll grow another beautiful, productive garden.

5. We will see Grandma and Grandpa alot (hopefully).

6. We will get a webcam to talk/see Daddy daily online.

Other ideas?

My son recently grasped the reality of a deployment for the first time. He said, "What? Where is Dad going?" He wondered why dad would be leaving us for so long, and I was put on the spot to answer that question. I told him, "Jaegar, your dad would stay here if there was any way he could, but he serves our country to protect us - his family - and the rest of the people around us. We can be proud that Daddy is such a good man, does his job so well, and loves us so much. He'll be back before you know it, and then we'll have a big party!" Jaegar seemed satisfied enough with that answer, and was on to the next topic. Daddy is not abandoning us, he's serving us... and that is something I want to reiterate to our children daily.

A New Season

Morning moonset over Big Mountain from our front yard

Well, its been a long time. After the loss of the entire hive last June, I kinda gave up bee blogging, as that was the primary focus of this blog. However, I've decided to shift gears a little, just for the current era, and focus on our life as we prepare for my husband's deployment and our consequent life left behind. I've debated this for awhile, and concluded that this is local living at its best or worst or most realistic or something... just with a little different, world conscience twist. I imagine this as carthartic - there are so many thoughts and experiences occurring even now, months beforehand - for me, personally, it will be valuable to be able to look back at this journey, and see that it really wasn't so overwhelming after all.

And here they are... my sweet military family

Barack Obama announced recently that 30,000 additional troops will be arriving in Afghanistan this year to support the surge needed to eventually turn the country back over to itself. This has profound consequences for many of us in the United States, and my family is one drop in the bucket of affected lives, not really unique, but a story nonetheless.

Its not like we are new to the deployment experience... we've done this twice before. J was in Japan, Guam and had plenty of close calls in Iraq. We've weathered guiding our child through daddy's absence. We've had the hurried, sad goodbyes and the glorious, almost surreal returns. However, this time is entirely different. In the past J was active duty, and there was a support system of other military families undergoing the same event. It was more normal, if that's even possible. I was able to move back to my hometown and have the support of my family loving and encouraging and simply keeping the loneliness at bay. Now we are an island, a reserve military family in a sea of civilians - no comrads in war, no family to depend upon. It can be a harrowing thought. Alas, I'm reminded that we really have it so good - our blessings are overflowing! I'm not a single mother, struggling to make ends meet - God bless those women! - we're not really alone. Perhaps part of this experience is a lesson for me, a lesson in empathy for the widows and orphans of the world... Let me embrace that, and be thankful for the trials in life. I love the Bible verse: "...Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope..." (Romans 5:3-4). The suffering is not really suffering after all...

Oh Christmas Tree!


Now we try to accomodate J's increasingly busy schedule. His phone conferences and weekends away, his three plus week FEX, his full time civilian job on top of that, and the stresses that he bears with such dignity, despite nights of waking up for hours with racing thoughts, despite missing out on the slow simple things. There is no better person to hold his position... he is a leader and will serve us all to the highest standard. I love you, J.